How Our Cat Became Human (or at least SHE thinks she is)

Hello, all! Today we have a guest blog from resident house cat, Ali. No, that makes me sound crazy.

This is me imagining what goes through Ali’s head in her supremely blessed little life. (Because that sounds sane, right?)

IMG_0676Hey, friends! This is me and my subservient human. She thinks we’re besties, but really, I am her master. I am the cute one on your right. I tend to hog photographs because I am so adorable. I can’t help that all my cuteness got concentrated in one big patch on the right side of my face.

IMG_0916When no one is home, I take glamourous selfies of myself making seductive eyes on the couch. Look at my white belly fur! Me-OW, am I right? That’s what I call tortitude.

IMG_1009When people are home, I prefer to make this face of determined desperation to trick them into doting on me. I will stare them down until they give in. If the staring alone doesn’t work, I throw in a few screeching, plaintive meows too. They practically chase after me to hang out at that point.

IMG_0934As you know, I am very adorable, so I get a lot of fan email. I usually get distracted by bubble screensaver or YouTube videos of birds before I get around to responding to any of them, but I appreciate my human admirers.

IMG_0977I tried reading some of my human’s “literature,” but gosh, it’s just soooooo boooooring. I like naps better. But I will always keep one eye half open to keep watch of my humans. You never know when they will escape.

IMG_1001Napping in the humans’ bed is my favorite. I like to get my many colors of fur all around so they can always have a little of me with them wherever they go. Now they can sleep on the couch, muahahahaha!

IMG_0691Sometimes (well, like everyday) my humans are rude and forget to invite me to breakfast or dinner. The girl human even sits in my chair. Ugh. So I sit on this armchair — they never use these armrests enough — and stare them down until they dote on me again.

IMG_1050

Here I am at cat headquarters. This is where I distract my male human from doing his “work” by — what else? –staring him down until he dotes at me. I also love the printer. I love to sit on it and make it do loud beeping noises in the middle of the night. Music to my ears!

IMG_1052And sometimes I just like to sit out of reach on the tall window, playing with a stained glass maple leaf to annoy the humans and contemplating my eventual world domination by way of cuteness.

Ah, the men in white jackets are coming to take me away now…

(Seriously though. Ali is SO MUCH CAT for one kitty. We love her. I think she loves us, too. And her photos are too cute not to share here and there.)

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3 Comments

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3 responses to “How Our Cat Became Human (or at least SHE thinks she is)

  1. Janet Price-Haughey

    In my next life I want to be a cat…no, I want to be YOUR cat!

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